The Next Step
"We're moving in together."
Four words most parents dread hearing from their child. Four words my boyfriend and I told our parents a few months ago.
We've decided to take the next step in our relationship but not until May. And this isn't a decision we've taken lightly at all.
He's not just some boy, after all. He's the one. I know that sounds cheesy, but it's true.
By the time May rolls around, we'll have been dating for nearly two-and-a-half years, and I've done my research. The two-year mark is the milestone most relationship experts say you should pass before moving in together. That's how long it takes for the warm fuzzies to wear off and reality to sink in. By that time you should know enough about your partner to determine if you really want to spend forever with him/her or if you want to cut the cords.
I've always said I wouldn't live with someone before we were married. I've even advised friends not to uproot themselves for a guy who hasn't at least given them a ring (I still stand by that advice). But the timing is just right.
I can't imagine my life without him in it. We're already spending every day/night together. He has stuff at my house, and I have stuff at his.
We've looked at, tried on and priced rings for the both of us. We've looked at house plans for our future home. We've talked about kids.
And we're paying double bills when we don't have to.
I'm sure people from both of our families will frown upon our decision, but that's just it. It's our decision and shouldn't be looked upon as the two of us 'shacking up'. Because it's so much more than that.
Four words most parents dread hearing from their child. Four words my boyfriend and I told our parents a few months ago.
We've decided to take the next step in our relationship but not until May. And this isn't a decision we've taken lightly at all.
He's not just some boy, after all. He's the one. I know that sounds cheesy, but it's true.
By the time May rolls around, we'll have been dating for nearly two-and-a-half years, and I've done my research. The two-year mark is the milestone most relationship experts say you should pass before moving in together. That's how long it takes for the warm fuzzies to wear off and reality to sink in. By that time you should know enough about your partner to determine if you really want to spend forever with him/her or if you want to cut the cords.
I've always said I wouldn't live with someone before we were married. I've even advised friends not to uproot themselves for a guy who hasn't at least given them a ring (I still stand by that advice). But the timing is just right.
I can't imagine my life without him in it. We're already spending every day/night together. He has stuff at my house, and I have stuff at his.
We've looked at, tried on and priced rings for the both of us. We've looked at house plans for our future home. We've talked about kids.
And we're paying double bills when we don't have to.
I'm sure people from both of our families will frown upon our decision, but that's just it. It's our decision and shouldn't be looked upon as the two of us 'shacking up'. Because it's so much more than that.
6 comments
50% divorce rate.
ReplyDeleteWhich means there's a 50% success rate.
ReplyDeleteI read this post minutes after it was published, Ashton, but I left without commenting. I can offer advice but in all honesty when it comes to relationships with women I have a poor track record. I am not what you would call a family guy. I dated my first wife for more than three years before we were married. After all that time marriage seemed like the next logical step. I went along with it but only halfheartedly. We did not live together before marriage but we should have. Living together puts a relationship to the test and the two of you need to be tested to find out if it's going to last. When the dust settles and the luster of courtship wears off you need to determine if your partner is a real friend who has the same goals or if he or she has a separate agenda. I have a feeling that you and your guy are a good fit and that the next step will one day lead to steps down the aisle. Best wishes and have a great Thanksgiving, dear friend!
ReplyDeleteTake it from me. Chris and I moved in together, and unlike when Tyler and I lived together.. we work, as a team. It's hard to explain, but when you are with someone every day and night, and you have gone through bills, stress, financial problems etc.. and they are STILL there for you, you've found the right person. I applaud this, I think EVERYONE should live together before they get married.. you need to know what that person is like in the best/worst of times. I know you already feel that, so I know you have found your match :)
ReplyDeleteWhat a great post. It made me smile :) Good for you and best of luck in everything.
ReplyDeleteThank you for the support :) I really appreciate it.
ReplyDelete